i would like to introduce myself.
now, you may be thinking: "um, i know you. i've known you for xx years (that is meant for you to fill in the appropriate number of years. not 20 in roman numerals. because that would be sort of weird for your inner monologue to speak in roman numerals. not that i judge. party on)."
so yes, introductions seem unnecessary. but i've been thinking lately how much of my life i have spent feeling on the outside of things. now, i want to be abundantly clear at this juncture that this entry does not, at any time or any way devolve into "whoa is parsnip" (a fairly ambitious claim given that i haven't written it yet. but that's how confident i am, for you). i am surrounded by so many truly amazing people (you!) that i really have more than my fair share. in fact, if i were truly charitable, i would give some of them back. but i won't.
no, this is not a exercise in how deeply unfortunate my life is because no one understands me. it's more about how we are perceived vis a vis what we think we're putting out there.
(continued after the jump...)
i have never really "fit in." you all will relate, i'm sure, especially those of you who were deemed "old souls" or don't/didn't fit into societal "norms" like most of your peer group did. this has gotten better as i've gotten older and more out with my life, but still, there are times where i sit and watch all these people who seem to get along and get each other and i feel like i'm sitting there going, "ohh, this is how humans interact." and i make these really weird jokes. while the feeling of not fitting in is probably fairly universal in childhood, usually most people have gotten it together by adulthood. they don't make jokes about sharks and battle creek, michigan (sorry, that reference was for precisely one person).
additionally, there are times when i say something that in my mind, sounds perfectly reasonable but i can tell, by the reaction of people who hear it, that it obviously did not come out right. i feel like so often, people think i am really incensed about something when in fact, i'm making a joke or being hyperbolic on purpose.
so to that end, i thought, with this new blogventure, i would take this opportunity to introduce myself to you all. here are some things about me (don't worry, it's a short list):
1. i have an opinion about EVERYTHING. literally everything. give me a subject and i can give you an opinion about it. mushrooms? disgusting. ducks? awesome.
1b. while being deeply opinionated, i am entirely non-judgmental. i hate mushrooms but i totally don't judge you for liking them. this can be hard for people to believe because i am so opinionated but really, i'm just sharing my thoughts. i try really hard to always couch things i say in a "this is how i feel" way and remember that things i dislike, other people really love. i don't think you're an idiot for liking them.
2. 9.99 times out of 10, i'm trying to be funny. i'm not saying i always succeed, but i am trying. i'm never trying to offend you and i'm never trying to insult you mostly because...
3. i'm actually a really tender-hearted person. i genuinely care about what people's feelings (this is starting to sound like an okcupid profile. i apologize for that) and i really, truly want nothing more from life than everyone to be happy. truly. it almost verges on naive, how much i want people to get along.
finally 4. my voice just sounds like this. it's not sarcasm. this one was actually pointed out to me by a co-worker when another co-worker thought i was saying something sarcastically. i know i can come off sardonic at times (usually meant for comedic effect, see #2), but i'm really never sarcastic to be mean (see #3).
i felt like it was important to give you all a parsnip primer because, well, i'm up to almost 100 page views on my two previous entries, which means that people are actually reading this (or my best friend is just reading it over and over) and i want us to get off on the right foot. oh, and thank you, you all are so dear.
it's nice to meet you.
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